Pre Divorce Counseling

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Pre divorce counseling is a necessity in almost all cases of dissolution. It is observed that many spouses directly conclude on a marital dissolution as the only solution to solve the conflicts between them. Counseling can open up the communication between spouses. It can find out other solutions for the marital disputes. If a is really required, pre divorce counseling works to prepare the spouses for a mutual and better procedure. Following are some basic reasons that result into a divorce:

• Poor communication is the foremost reason.
• Unresolved arguments and conflicts is the second most frequent reason.
• Infidelity is the third.

Let us consider the following statistics which shows the increasing number of termination cases in the society:

• Amongst first marriages, 40 to 50 percent end in termination
• Amongst second marriages, 60 percent end after some period
• Amongst third marriage, 75 percent result in dissolution

The prime intention is to avoid the spouses to jump directly to the dissolution of marriage, without trying to save the marriage.

Discussion during Pre Divorce Counseling

It is carried out by the professionals who are trained in this field. They have the legal knowledge of the state laws too. These experts will try to solve the matter by encouraging the communication between the partners. Following are some aspects:

Reason that led to the divorce

The first issue in front of the counselor is the cause. By means of discussion, the counselor tries to reach the root of the separation. After the counselor finds out the reason, it becomes possible for the counselor to estimate how the conflict progressed and how it would affect future relationships.

Marriage Counseling

This is also a type of pre divorce counseling. The counselor tries to determine if the problems in the marriage are fixable. Further, the counselor attempts to get both the spouses to work together in order to resolve the problems that are harming the marriage.

Family Counseling

This is essential if the spouses have children. The objective of the session is that each member in the family can express his/her opinion. Further, it is possible to talk regarding the problems that exist in the present scenario. The members can discuss how to collaborate to evolve as a family. Another intention of this session is that the children can be conveyed the news of the imminent case in a non judgmental and supportive ambience.

What if divorce is the only solution?

Let us consider a situation in which the spouses have discussed all issues with the counselor and it is concluded that for all those involved, divorce is the only solution. The last part of pre divorce counseling is to work with the counselor in order to prepare for the court case. The counselor can offer guidance in the following areas:

• What to expect in the days ahead?
• Coping skills for stress
• Opting for a mutual dissolution

Some aspects of Counseling in a forced divorce

Sometimes, the counselors observe that couples walk into their office with different opinions; One of them desires a separation while the other doesn't. The step to approach advise is the final resort prior to embarking on legal steps. The counselors can assist the couple to clear any doubts in their minds regarding the following issues:

• Why the couple is having the present difficulties?
• Whether the couple is opting out of the marriage for the right reasons?
• Is it likely that the husband/wife would face the same difficulties in the next relationship?

At the end of this divorce counseling, if the couple takes the decision to remain with each other, the counselor can guide them on how to reinforce the marriage. Every couple usually finds it most difficult and risky to open up about certain issues. However, these conversations have the greatest ability to enhance intimacy and commitment in the marital life.

Another mode of ending the guidance sessions is to finalize the decision of termination of marriage. In this case, the counselor can assist in resolution of power struggles or conflicts to opt for separation in an amicable fashion.

Lastly, it must be noted that divorce is an expensive issue. On the contrary, counseling and marriage is much cheaper. Therefore, the divorcing couples should give it a try before applying in the court. If the dissolution is inevitable, the counselors try to make it amicable and easy.

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